Why
by Rhett9
Summary: People leaving is always hard. Jarlos FRIENDSHIP.


I was getting soaked by the rain as it came down, it seemed like even the sky was mourning the loss of Carlos. I was walking to the park where Carlos and I used to hang out when we were younger; I had some time before I had to sing at his memorial service. I wasn't focusing on the rain, however. I was focusing on what had driven my childhood friend to kill himself at the age of seventeen.

"Why did you leave me?" I whispered to myself as I took a seat on the park bench. I have asked myself why every day since I learned Carlos had committed suicide. I was supposed to be his best friend, how could I not see the pain he was in? How could I have been so blind?

"How are you James?" I looked up at the sound of Mr. Garcia's voice. I was thankful for the rain: it would hide my tears from him. Mr. Garcia had been like a second father to me and I knew today was hard for him.

"I've been better." I answered as he took a seat next to me. "I just I feel like I failed Carlos."

"How so?" Mr. Garcia asked. His voice was hoarse and I knew he must have been crying earlier.

"I was his best friend. I should have been there for him. I should have noticed he was depressed. I should have been able to help him." I replied trying to keep my emotions under control.

"James, this isn't your fault. None of us saw what Carlos was going through. He kept it all bottled up. You know he always put others before himself." Mr. Garcia said patting my shoulder.

"I miss him." I said as I looked around the park.

"So do I." Mr. Garcia said wiping his eyes.

"This is the park where you boys met isn't it?" Mr. Garcia asked. I nodded. I had met Carlos in this park when I was six. He was trying to buy a corndog but he didn't have enough money, so I helped him get one. Afterwards we got to talking and from that day forward we were inseparable. Well, until now.

"You know Carlos always told me the day he met you was the best day of his life."

"It was the best day of my life too." I whimpered. "A piece of me is missing now."

"I-I want to die." I said as Mr. Garcia squeezed my hand.

"You don't mean that, James."

"Yes I do. It hurts too much."

"James, listen to me I know it hurts but you can't give up. I lost one son, I am not going to lose another." Mr. Garcia said looking me in the eyes. I could see the pain and fear in his.

"I promise not to." I said.

"It's time for the memorial." Mr. Garcia said looking at his watch.

"Do you still think you will be able to sing?"

"I have to." Carlos always loved my singing, he believed in me and my dream of being a singer. His faith in me is what made me believe in myself with him gone I was lost.

"I understand." Mr. Garcia said getting up.

"I would like to sing this song in honor of Carlos Garcia. Carlos was not only my best friend he was also my brother." I said as I looked into the crowd gathered for Carlos' funeral.

_It must've been in a place so dark you couldn't feel the light_

_Reachin' for you through that stormy cloud_

_Now here we are gathered in our little hometown_

_This can't be the way you meant to draw a crowd_

_Oh, why? That's what I keep askin'_

_Was there anything I could have said or done?_

_Oh, I had no clue you were masking_

_A troubled soul, God only knows what went wrong_

_And why you'd leave the stage in the middle of a song_

_Now in my mind I keep you frozen as a seventeen year old_

_Roundin' third to score the winning run_

_You always played with passion no matter what the game_

_When you took the stage, you shined just like the sun_

_Oh, why? That's what I keep askin'_

_And was there anything I could have said or done?_

_Oh, I had no clue you were masking_

_A troubled soul, oh, God only knows what went wrong_

_And why you'd leave the stage in the middle of a song_

_Now the oak trees are swayin' in the early autumn breeze_

_The golden sun is shining on my face_

_The tangled thoughts I hear a mockingbird sing_

_This old world really ain't that bad a place_

_Oh, why? There's no comprehending_

_And who am I to try to judge or explain?_

_Oh, but I do have one burning question_

_Who told you life wasn't worth the fight?_

_They were wrong, they lied, and now you're gone, and we cried_

_'Cause it's not like you to walk away in the middle of a song_

_Your beautiful song, your absolutely beautiful song._

My song asked all my unanswered questions. I would never understand why Carlos left me but I did know I would never forget him.

**Author Note I do not own BTR or Why- By Rascal Flatts**


End file.
